72 Terrible Things Global Warming Will Apparently Cause
As everyone knows global warming will kill us all in as little as 12, 11, 10 years.
But it’s actually way worse than that.
Global warming — caused of course by corporate greed/gas guzzling SUVs/supersized hamburgers/greedy, fat, stupid Americans, etc. — is being predicted to cause all manner of disaster.
Scientists eager to terrify people into taking them seriously have over the last several decades made a series of frightful predictions.
For example, did you know man-made global warming will result in more miscarriages in Bangladesh? It’s true, the BBC said so.
Or that our changing climate — again due almost exclusively to our rampant consumerism and the overwhelming influence of the Big Straw lobby — will result in fewer circumcisions in some African tribes? Scientists say it’s so!
Some of these predictions, however, somehow never came to pass. For example, scientists in 2007 warned that the arctic would be “ice free” by 2013, yet today are trying to figure out why arctic ice is instead increasing.
Man-made climate change was also predicted to kill thousands of Brits — by 2018. Whoops.
To keep track of these scientists’ most bizarre, and most terrifying, doomsday prophesies, we’ve started the news list below. And as you already know, 97 percent of scientists agree you should read it, bookmark it, and share it with it with your friends.
Summary | Date | Source |
---|---|---|
‘Making mountaineering riskier’ | 11/01/2019 | BBC |
‘Thermostat gender bias’ | 01/14/2019 | Forbes |
25 percent of bridges to collapse | 10/23/2019 | New Scientist |
Acne | 07/03/2009 | Indian Journal of Dermatology |
AIDS | 01/10/2017 | The Conversation |
Airplane turbulence | 03/11/2019 | Forbes |
All aspects of life in Asia worsening | 03/18/2014 | The Third Pole |
Allergies | 06/10/2013 | Newsweek |
An end to walking in the woods | 03/11/2019 | CNN |
Asthma | 07/02/2013 | Medscape |
Bumpier airplane rides | 04/08/2013 | HuffPost |
Cannibalism | 04/01/2008 | PBS |
Child sex trafficking | 04/05/2019 | Associated Press |
Chocolate shortages | 02/14/2012 | Los Angeles Times |
Coffee that tastes bad | 06/21/2017 | CNN |
Death of 100 million people by 2030 | 09/25/2012 | Reuters |
Death of farm animals | 04/11/2013 | U.S. News & World Report |
Death of thousands of Brits — by 2018 | 02/12/2008 | The Guardian |
Different colored oceans | 02/04/2019 | CNN |
Disrupting ratio of male-to-female babies | 01/23/2019 | CNN |
Dogs to be ‘bridge food’ for unemployed masses | 05/01/2014 | The Guardian |
Earth looking like Venus | 07/05/2017 | BBC |
Elder death | 07/23/2012 | Climate Central |
End of the Jersey Shore by 2030 | 03/15/2012 | CBS News |
Extinction of 1,000,000 species | 05/06/2019 | The New York Times |
Extinction of humanity | 08/11/2008 | The Guardian |
Fewer circumcisions in Africa | 11/03/2007 | The Age |
Fewer wolverines | 02/01/2013 | The Guardian |
Flesh-eating bacteria | 07/30/2014 | CBS News |
Food tasting bad | 03/20/2015 | Vice |
Football sized horses | 11/06/2013 | Yahoo! |
Genocide in Darfur | 04/01/2007 | The Atlantic |
Global catastrophe — by 2020 | 03/26/2012 | Reuters |
Global conflicts | 10/20/2018 | The Guardian |
Hurricanes | 10/23/2001 | Salon |
Internet going offline | 07/16/2018 | University of Oregon |
Large accumulations of ‘rock snot’ | 05/10/2014 | Charleston Gazette-Mail |
Less productive workdays | 04/23/2014 | The Tico Times |
Less sex | 11/02/2015 | Bloomberg |
Locust invasion | 01/24/2020 | Associated Press |
Make us look different | 09/07/2018 | NBC News |
Mental health issues | 10/09/2018 | The Daily Mail |
Miscarriages in Bangladesh | 11/26/2018 | BBC |
More kidney stones | 07/10/2014 | Science Daily |
More man-eating tigers | 05/17/2019 | Newsweek |
More murder in Chicago | 01/30/2013 | The Daily Caller |
More prostitution | 04/29/2013 | The Hill |
More rats | 05/22/2019 | Axios |
No more air travel | 06/20/2017 | The New York Times |
No more almonds | 06/25/2019 | Vox |
No more avocados | 06/25/2019 | Vox |
No more beer | 10/15/2018 | The Hill |
No more berries | 06/25/2019 | Vox |
No more coffee | 06/25/2019 | Vox |
No more ice hockey | 07/25/2014 | Bleacher Report |
No more ice in the arctic — by 2013 | 12/12/2017 | BBC |
No more ice in the arctic — by 2018 | 06/23/2008 | USA Today |
No more Joshua trees | 08/31/2019 | CBS News |
No more rain | 07/01/1988 | Portsmouth Daily Times |
No more redheads | 08/21/2014 | The Daily Record |
No more wine | 06/25/2019 | Vox |
Old people getting sick | 12/03/2013 | Medscape |
Organs in your body not working | 07/25/2017 | Climate Depot |
Police shootings like in Ferguson | 09/17/2014 | National Review |
Return of bus-sized snakes | 11/06/2013 | Yahoo! News |
Rise, expansion of Boko Haram | 05/09/2014 | The Guardian |
Russia to control world’s food supply | 03/12/2014 | Los Angeles Times |
Shrinking salamanders | 03/25/2014 | Watts Up With That? |
Smaller reindeer | 12/11/2016 | AFP |
Stonehenge being topped by moles | 05/27/2016 | The Daily Mail |
Suicide | 07/31/2017 | The Guardian |
Superbugs | 05/23/2014 | Medscape |
Too many homeruns | 04/30/2012 | Scientific American |
Too much Antarctic ice | 10/10/2012 | Associated Press |
UK weather too wet, dry, hot, & cold | 03/25/2014 | The Guardian |
Vaccine spoilage | 06/24/2014 | Reuters |
Webbed feet in humans | 01/13/2016 | The Daily Mail |
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Andy Rowlands
| #
Great article Tom, your sense of humour mirrors my own when discussing the seemingly-endless list of lunatic predictions alarmists come out with. As Edmund Blackadder said “That is the worst and most contemptible idea since Olaf the Hairy; high chief of all the Vikings, ordered 80,000 battle helmets….with the horns on the inside” 🙂
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tom0mason
| #
Tom,
Here a few more for you …
In 2019 —
from https://www.independent.co.uk/environment/fish-chips-climate-change-cod-haddock-extinct-smaller-research-a8961201.html
This is a rehash of the older 2017 Guardian journalist unimaginative take on a very speculative antiscience paper (see https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2017/sep/02/fish-conservation-foreign-species-uk-waters-climate-change )
This fishy story gets dragged out about every 2-3 years and it still isn’t happening :-).
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And so too shellfish …
From https://www.standard.co.uk/news/britains-shellfish-marching-northwards-to-beat-warming-seas-7183388.html . Wednesday 20 December 2006 …
No more cockles and mussels alive alive oh! … Poor Molly Malone 🙂
~~~~~~~~~
Oct 25, 2015 and it’s the prickly end to hedgehogs …
Screams the UK’s Daily Mirror at https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/hedgehogs-could-extinct-just-10-6702875
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
2016 Skin Cancer
Residence and vacationers will, might, could be affected
From https://climate-adapt.eea.europa.eu/metadata/publications/climate-change-and-skin-cancer-case-study-of-potential-sunsmart-application-in-cornwall
Another evidence free study with large amount of speculation …
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And finally there’s HAIR LOSS!
From https://www.healththoroughfare.com/news/the-impact-of-climate-change-on-hair-loss-tips-that-help/19973
Or is it that all this climate hysteria causes many to pull their hair out?
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